busy as the proverbial one-legged man

to say i've been busy would be an understatement of massive proportions. i redid my new chair, and then i got super-zealous and redid my dresser. it was a ton of work, it took 2 days of concentrated effort. the "good" thing was it started raining early saturday morning. as a result, i moved the yard sale into the carport. it worked out well, because i could work on the dresser while people shopped. it was also hot as blazes sitting in the direct sun. the temperature itself was only about 80 degrees, but sitting right under the sun...i was cooking. i have a nice tan now. however - i was closely eyeing my skin this morning whilst showering. not because i'm superficial, but because i was trying to scrape the 4 colors of paint on my body off of it. i noticed that after getting tan in the sun, my skin looks a little rough. it's easier to see fine lines.

oh and between all this painting and yard sale fun, i've been showing the house to prospective renters (for my landlord) and packing and cleaning constantly. i'm tired (as evidenced by my four hour, flat-out nap today).

we made around $200 at the yard sale (i'm very motivated to get rid of crap). we still have a fair amount that needs to be sold, so i think we'll be making a big donation to salvation army. jim also sold an old kayak that has been taking up space in the basement with the ones he does use. we got $200 for it and $20 for an old skirt. so yay! money to help us move.

we did brunch this morning. spectacular as usual (at our local trendy hippie spot - tomatohead). tomorrow, we're going home in the evening for a memorial day bbq. ahh....do ya'll have ANY concept of how glad i am to be OUT of vet school FOREVER??

sorry about the before dresser picture - the camera battery was dead before i started working, and i was so eager to start - i didn't want to wait. so that's alison (my bff) modeling the dresser in my blue dress. the before picture of the chair is one post down. i think i've found a new hobby.

whoohooo!!!!!

i'm getting this chair for $5 tomorrow. i'll be painting it the high gloss black like the one below. for the seat, i'm going to go with the fabric i almost bought today - it's an aquamarine and gold brocade - really lovely. it'll go great with the cover i did today - in a clashing/trendy sort of way.

i love craigslist!!

what do a bee and myself have in common??

busyness, by jove - busyness. what have i been doing with my time, you might ask?

well - since we have a moving date and a house, i've been packing, cleaning, and preparing for a yard sale on saturday. yay! stuff will be sold. what isn't sold will go the way of the goodwill. down with clutter!! it doesn't look like we have that much stuff, but i'm still working on the living room - and i've been working (granted, disjointedly) for 3 days. i'm still not finished. t's disheartening - moving is. it takes so long, and you start to think that you're a total and complete slob - no matter how clean you attempt to be. i mean - i clean on a daily basis. sweeping and that sort of thing. i realize we have 7 animals running around this place, but still - i clean all the time. and yet - when i move the books from the shelves - there are dust bunnies at every turn. DUST EVERYWHERE. it's driving me batty. it looks like i'm some sort of total and complete slob.

sort of related - domino is one of my favorite magazines as of late. it's a home decor rag. looking at the beautiful designs - the stunning houses with funky but inviting decor makes me salivate for decent furniture. never one to buy expensive furniture (with the exception of our bed and mattress) - jim and i have many, many cheapo pieces of furniture. we also have quite a bit of hand-me down furniture that's perfectly functional but outdated in paint, etc. we have nice (but cheap) bookshelves from target and that sort of thing. we also have some decent furniture that's in poor shape - like my dresser (i purchased it from goodwill for $10 back in the day). at any rate, reading domino magazine has given me the courage to try and redo some of the smaller pieces of furniture myself. for instance, we have a heinous, gigantic, 70's era dark wood dining table. i would love to replace it with something more modern and attractive. unfortunately, i do not have $200-1000 to plunk down on furniture. luckily, i won't need an official desk where we're moving, so we're going to use jim's desk (which is really a dark walnut dining table with simple, clean lines) as our table (and he will inherit my old desk). i've been haunting goodwill/salvation army/KARM/and AmVet for cheap mismatched chairs that i can paint and re-upholster to make a non-matched but uber-cute set. above is the first victim - before and after. i'm really proud of the outcome. so much that i'm on a rampage now. we have two little end tables (see one in the picture) that we inherited from jim's parents. they're quite functional and sturdy, but the stain is peeling away and they look a bit ragged. no fear! i painted one today. it looks great. when i'm finished stenciling on it, i'll post pics of it too.

must give a shout out to lowe's - they were totally helpful, given that i know absolutely NOTHING about painting and had to ask a thousand questions like how and why to prime wood and what kind of paintbrushes should i buy and is staining wood hard and do i have to strip it first or something...and on and on and on.

i'm turning into a domestic goddess, as my mother phrased it. i've been cooking breakfast and dinner almost every night. i tried a stuffed chicken breast marinara recipe which turned out well (stuffed with spinach, mozzarella, ricotta, etc). currently, a meatloaf is aromatizing the house. i don't think i've EVER made meatloaf. it was never one of my favorite dishes. although my mother-in-law has a spectacular recipe that i need to try. luckily, i have a husband that is totally down with eating whatever i cook. unfortunately, he's not the most discriminating guy in the world - though i love him so:)

kitten went to his new home yesterday. it was like ripping a band-aid off. i had to leave him with his new owners. a veterinary technician from school took him home, so i know he'll have a good life. i do miss him so, though. he was a nice little diversion to have around. he loved the moving boxes and took great pleasure in hiding behind them, only to come prancing out sideways with his back arched... **sigh** i wish i could keep them all.

anyway, i have painting to finish. later.

... and we all fall down ... down

these past few days have been busy busy busy.

saturday heralded our first camping trip in a very long time. the BH wanted to kayak the cheoah since this is the last scheduled release for the summer. since he was going to run it both saturday and sunday, i decided to traipse along and hang out on santeelah lake while he did that. saturday was absolutely stunning. our campsite was directly on the water - water so clear and blue that you could see all the way to the bottom at 15 feet deep. i left the camera at home, so you'll have to envision the vista our tent afforded us. on unzipping the flap, one could stare across the peaceful, blue lake to the nearby bursting with green-ness mountains ringing it. i spent a few peaceful hours floating on the lake, worshipping the devil god of melanoma and enjoying the spring breeze. at around 4:30, we (the wife and significant other of jim's 2 kayaking buddies) decided to drive down to the river and see if we couldn't catch the boys running bear creek falls - the biggest and baddest rapid (at least - visually) on the river. luck was with us, as we only had to wait about 15 minutes before the BH and his kayaking buddies showed up. the video above is bear creek falls, although that is not the BH running it. he does it with much more style:)

saturday night was spent sitting around a campfire eating weenies and s'moreos (what happens to s'mores when you don't have access to graham crackers but have to instead rely on oreos). we also got ... eh ... inebriated. what else is camping for, after all?? the next day, we drove into robbinsville for a greasy, southern style breakfast, then the men dumped us again for a day running the cheoah. i had big plans that involved the lake, the sun, and more sun-devil worship. the weather had other plans, unfortunately. the day stayed shrouded in grey. shortly after the boys left us, it began to rain in earnest. not to worry - the kitten (whom i haven't found a home for yet) and i stayed in the tent, with the flap open, watching rain fall on the lake, finishing my book, and napping. it was quite relaxing - one might even say rather decadent. i love this whole not being in vet school anymore thing.

today, we got up early and went to chatty to look at a house we found online. it's great, and we decided to rent it. the neighborhood is lovely, full of huge, green trees, neat houses, and old people. it's a 7 minute commute to my new job. the house itself is 3 bedroom 1 1/2 bath with an extra room off the kitchen big enough to be a study or an extra living room or something like that. i'm pretty content with it, although the kitchen is a bit small. we're supposed to move in around june 7th, so the next few weeks will be spent packing, cleaning, and throwing crap away. i plan to throw A LOT of stuff in the trash. i refuse to succumb to the pack-rat tendencies that plague my otherwise perfect family.

chattanooga is a great town. jim and i spent some time roaming the streets of downtown, and it's a really incredible city. both of us kept commenting on how much it reminded of us asheville (indisputably our favorite town). i'm really excited to be moving there. we found a little greasy spoon diner already that we will probably frequent (the longhorn restaurant). small, quaint, with vinyl covered barstools, a homemade cake under a glass cakebell, friendly service, and greasy, southern food...it was perfection.

and on that note, i have some closets that could use my distracted attention...

tell me where it hurts...

is a book about being a veterinary surgeon. while hanging out with the better half (BH from now on) at Barnes&Noble yesterday and being pretentious white people (see: http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/ for a summary of these things), i picked up this new book. i don't think it's particularly well-written, and i think the surgeon writing it might be something of a prick, but on the other hand, i kept chuckling out loud at some of the patients and clients he described. it was bang-on, if nothing else. thus - for anyone interested in vet med - or for anyone in vet med - if you want a laugh and to feel smart when you correctly diagnose his patients before he does (in the book) - give it a read. it's fast, if nothing else.

sundries...

so predictably, graduation has been somewhat traumatic. you can want something, yearn towards it, and still have trouble accepting it when the reality arrives. hooding itself was rather anti-climactic and frazzling. my grandparents came from florida, my in-laws from east of here, my parents, my siblings (all 4 of them), and my 2 best friends also came. it was very busy. i felt like i saw everyone and talked to no one for more than 30 seconds. the whole affair was very rushed and chaotic. but i was still grateful that i got to see everyone - as briefly as i did. and it was immensely gratifying to see and be reminded of my support system so tangibly. i am very lucky.

i haven't been doing much with myself since i graduated. moping around and feeling lost. this morning, i snapped out of that. i had a productive day - getting all of my licensure information in line and ready to mail, going to the bank, dry cleaners, and whatnot. i spent a few hours at barnes and noble reading cookbooks and other fiction. i stole 2 recipes which i tried my hand at tonight: kentucky okra, tomato, and corn stew and baked cheese olive balls. the stew was too sweet for my tastes - but the husband enjoyed it. i liked the olive balls a great deal - little flaky balls of cheesy and olive-y goodness. it was a simple recipe too. i also made a rump roast. it was quite decadent. tomorrow i'm going to try something with the yummy looking pineapple i purchased.

i finally finished ian mcewan's 'atonement' - not for lack of wanting to do so. it's been living at my brother's residence ever since the baby was born. i went and babysat for them the other day, spending 2 hours with my adorable niece while they grocery shopped. i also reclaimed the book and finished reading it. mcewan is an undeniably talented writer, but i never connect with his characters. i understand them in the abstract, their feelings, their torments...i can almost empathize with them but not quite. that lack of empathy is what always leaves me cold about his books. although both it and 'enduring love' were good.

i'm reading "better: a surgeon's notes on performance." it's riveting. it also really makes me want to write a book about vet school. the author's writing style is evocative and reminds me of my own. his stories - though dealing with human patients - are very familiar. it's a best-seller. if people like it so much, perhaps a book on veterinary medicine will be as popular. after all, everyone i meet is fascinated and/or inquisitive about my profession. i can't count how many people have told me "i wanted to be a veterinarian."

oh and as a nice graduation gift, my in-laws are giving us their older mercedes M class SUV. it's not really a car that's eh...smart for us. with gas prices what they are and the large tires that probably cost a tad more than my ford escort's. but it's in great shape, well-taken care of, and it will be my commuting from home to work car. so the gas shouldn't be bad. a big shout-out to the in-laws for thinking of us. pretty soon i hope that we won't need hand-me downs anymore - but until then - thanks and we love you:)

oh, the video i have posted in the sidebar is from our senior roast. watch it - it's pretty dang good. we made it as a farewell/homage to vet school. the whole thing is filmed in the main corridor of the good 'ole UTCVM and the prep room (anesthesia). those are my classmates. and how i'll miss them (contrary to what i once thought). the goofy and talented blonde in 80s get-up lip syncing is dr gordon (how weird to say that). she was the brains behind the whole thing - and it turned out smashingly. i'm not in the video (but my 2 best friends are - the girl in the cowboy hat - deb, and the blonde with pigtails - alisha), i slept through it because i was on overnights. i am featured heavily in the true roast video, where we made fun of our clinicians, interns, and residents, as well as the grueling road that is vet school in general (read: lots of laughing at how awful the barn is). however, that's not posted on youtube yet. if it is, i'll add it here so that ya'll can make fun of my terrible (read: lacking) acting skills.

toodles.

hooding

and........................scene

this morning was my last morning in the barn...or anywhere in the vet school. i am officially finished. it's over. i walk across the stage in 3 days.

I FINISHED VETERINARY SCHOOL.

oil and water

i am the oil. everyone else in my life is the water. i don't know if it's because of my imminent graduation or my period or the huge changes pending in my life - but i am the oil these days. the rest of the world is the water with which i am thrown. i'm on a rotation with a good friend. we keep striking against each other like matches against flint. and jim - god - all we do these days is argue. we're considering buying a house. i came home with information, excited at the prospect of what finally feels like an adult life - and we wound up in an argument. seems to be the theme these days.

what is wrong with me lately?

i gained 5 lbs on my critical care (overnight) rotation. likely because all i did was eat to stay awake. it's made my self-esteem plummet - especially knowing i'll see my family in less than a week at graduation and have to hear that i'm stocky, i'll always be stocky...blah blah blah. i think i'd be okay with my body if my upbringing hadn't skewed me so badly and made me so self-conscious of how i look.

i shouldn't be depressed. i should be happy. i'm on the cusp of my professional life. 6 years ago - lost in the human medical insurance field - i was miserable, confused, searching for a job that i thought would bring me fulfillment. and now - here i am - about to be fulfilled. i don't deal well with change. and it's coming at me fast. i'm just not a very adaptable creature. evolution should probably have already weeded me out...

it's funny. as hard as the last 2 years have been - ever since my life came semi-crashing down - and as much as i swore i wanted to be away from the vet school - now that it's almost here, i'm scared. scared and sad and ... something else that i cannot put my finger on exactly. i don't want to say nostalgic. it's not quite that. it's nostalgia and fear and yearning and regret and wistfulness and wonder and loss - all at one time. there is no word for that.

i don't know why i posted that pic of myself and jim. i'd never seen it before today. someone gave it to me on a CD of pictures...and i look happy in it, i suppose. but somehow that smile doesn't touch my eyes. i think it's evocative of how i feel at the moment...

i bet you never thought you'd hear these words out of my mouth

equine surgery isn't that bad.

*take a deep breath now, recover from the shock...*

maybe it's because i know this is my last rotation ever. maybe it's because equine surgery takes all the lameness cases, so i spend a good 2-3 hours outside every day doing lameness exams on horses and basking in the glow of the late april sunshine. maybe it's because we have the new senior students - who are taking essentially all of the cases now. maybe it's because the clinician gave me and my fellow rotation-mates (class of 2008) the entire weekend off AND guaranteed us that we'd also have next weekend. most of us aren't taking cases as the primary student anymore but hanging back and letting the new students take the cases. we oversee them, help them figure out the paperwork, order tests, organize their time efficiently, etcetera. i'm still working all day, but as more of a supervisor than anything. the resident (whom we spend 90% of our time with) is excellent. he enjoys teaching, he's always in a good mood, he loves students, and he's very pro-senior. he's made sure to let us off for senior events like the making of our roast video and the honors convocation.

speaking of the honors convocation, i was awarded the Ophthalmology award this year. i feel gratified that of all my classmates, i was chosen for this award. mainly because it was my very first rotation as a 4th year veterinary student - an entire year ago - and they remembered me all that time. there were some surprises at the honors convo - some awards didn't go to those we all expected. i suppose that's the politics and BS of vet school, though.

the kitten i took in 3 weeks ago (see older post) is thriving. he was so young then, i didn't really think he'd make it. but he's hanging in there and has gotten to be a fat sassy little thing. his name is metan (pronounced mi-tan).

i went shopping today and bought my graduation dress and shoes. it's only 11 days away.

ELEVEN DAYS.